I have seen enough posts about how stay at home moms do a great deal of work and how it is no less than having a full-time job. Believe me this is not about that. So I had a job and I had to quit because of some reasons, not necessarily being married. May be at that time I was not so much interested in that, but what to do if now I am, after being married and having a child? Here is a list of what problems that occur when you decide to restart your career or to be a stay at home mom for the rest of your life.
Respect/Self-respect – Love and respect are the two vital things in anyone’s life and when people see you with the eye that oh! now you are a housewife, act like a housewife. Acting like a housewife, what does that even mean? Thanks to the societal mentality, they won’t give me the respect that I deserve, and I can’t think of myself as worthy of that respect because now I have to see myself from others eyes, so I can’t take pride in saying I am a housewife, there will always be raised eyebrows and sorry faces to make you realize your worthlessness.
Gradually Changing Job-Market - This is the main problem when you want to take a pause and then restart a career. If I got married at an age of 25 and have a kid by 26 by the time my kid goes to school I will hit 30 and that will be the time I will think of restarting my career. So, what will be my position in the job market. I don’t think any good company will give me an opportunity at a good position. Every company wants to have young blood and at 30 you are no more a young blood.
Lost Interest - When you are a stay at home mom for a long time, you lose this interest to go in the job market and sell yourself. That pause of the career now becomes your whole life and you seem bounded by your own rules. But at time to time the feeling of not doing anything and feeling worthless creeps along also regret is bound to be there in either case.
Too Much Interference - When you are married, any decision of yours is not your sole decision, not that I am against people providing their view points in your life, sometimes that proves to be a great help, but there are restrictions in Indian society after marriage for a girl/woman, e.g., you can’t do night shift, can’t go for any job that is considered “menial” in the society you belong. (Oh your daughter-in-law works at a call center, what shame!).
Apart from these problems, there are many other issues that occur in such a case, still women who choose to bounce back in career do so regardless of these issues. Salute to those women.